Warning Signs Someone May Be an Abuser
by Raquel Hunter
If you are in a new relationship, you may be wondering how you can tell if you are with someone who has the potential to be an abuser. Here is a list of warning signs which may help you identify if your new partner may be an abuser.
- He or she professes his or her undying love to you very soon in the relationship and comes across as genuinely warm and charming.
- He or she is overly suspicious and jealous of you and your activities.
- He or she may try to control your life. This may include trying to control where you go, who you see, what money you spend, what you wear, where you work and more.
- He or she may show a general lack of respect and a strong disliking to authority figures. This may be law officials, on the job managers, parents, clergy and more.
- He or she may exhibit a dual personality. One part of him or her is sweet, charming and youthful. The other part of him or her is angry, authoritative, and/or aggressively violent.
- He or she has hit, shoved, pinched, kicked or hurt you in the past.
- He or she has battered a former spouse or romantic interest.
- He or she is threatened by any successes you may have in your life, separate from him or her.
- Alcohol or drugs seem to aggravate his or her violent tendencies.
- He or she may somehow find a way to blame you for any disappointments that he or she may have.
- He or she may want to use sex as a way of making up after an explosive or violent outburst.
- He or she will put you down and try to embarrass you in public and/or private.
- He or she may experience road rage very frequently.
- He or she is very competitive and is a very sore loser.
- His or her word comes to mean nothing.
- He or she will try to isolate you from your family and friends.
- He or she may roughhouse on occasion, but you notice that he or she is getting more rough.
If you are a victim of domestic violence, help is available. Call the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-SAFE. They will direct you to safe places in your area where you can seek help.