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Crying During or After Sex: Why it Happens to Women and What it Could Mean

If you’ve ever noticed a tear rolling down your cheek during intercourse, you were likely confused, frustrated, or maybe even embarrassed. But rest assured, it happens to the best of us and it’s not as uncommon as you may think. In fact, many women find themselves bursting into tears for no obvious reason, leaving their partners puzzled as well.

Sometimes the cause of the tears is obvious, but most times, it appears to be a mystery. To help you solve the mystery, these are the most common reasons your emotional threshold may break down during sex:

  1. A problem in the relationship. Even if you’re not aware of it, an issue between you and your partner may be weighing heavily on your subconscious. Although the relationship may appear to be going great, any unresolved resentment can snowball into something greater and work its way into your sex life. Something as simple as an argument about money can cause trouble in an otherwise healthy relationship, particularly if the issues have not been resolved. Sex is a very emotional experience for some women, and you may find harboured feelings breaking free once you and your partner make that connection.
  2. Relationship fears. Any fear related to the relationship - such as concerns that your partner may be thinking about leaving you, finds you less desirable, or isn’t as interested in sex as he or she used to be – can leave you feeling vulnerable. Not surprisingly, vulnerability can play a huge part in your sex life because of its heavy effects on your self-esteem and confidence. As you enter into that close physical bond with your partner, these feelings may brew to the surface and soon lead to a wet pillow.
  3. Hormones, hormones, hormones. We all know that PMS and pregnancy can make a woman emotional, much like sex. During acts of sexual intimacy, your hormones are raging, potentially sparking a sea of mixed emotions. A few tears may not be a huge issue, but if your bouts of crying have worsened over time or cause problems in the relationship, voice these concerns to your doctor. Contraceptives may also play a role, so if you recently changed pills or starting using another type of birth control (or stopped altogether), this may give you a clue.

The crying may also occur after sex, when a woman’s body is still swirling with emotions. As with any sexual problem, speak to a medical professional or counsellor if you feel something is not right.

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