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Spice up your sex life with dirty talk If you want to spice up your sex life, consider dirty talk during sex. Part of the turn-on of talking dirty is that most men and don't talk explicitly about sex to their partners. Saving your wild side for behind closed doors can spice up a so-so sex life instantly. Tips on how to talk dirty: Be authentic. Good dirty talk is completely what you make it, and to do it well, you have to be yourself. While you may take on a role in your dirty talk (e.g. the lavishly submissive, or extremely dominating) you need to find something of yourself in the role. Make a list of different aspects of your personality you can draw on for inspiration. Give your partner a taste of what is in store for them by sending sexy text messages or emails. Develop a dirty talk voice. Your dirty talk voice might be low rhythmic grunts, high pitched squeals, or precise whispers. Your dirty talk voice might reflect the way you talk in your daily life, or it might express a different aspect of your personality. You can have several dirty talk voices. You can use one voice during 'quickies' and another voice during slow, rhythmic sex. Expand your dirty talk vocabulary. Dirty talk is your opportunity to pull out all the stops on the foul mouth express. Unless you're role playing calls for it, avoid clinical terms. If you are not sure what to say, do a little research by reading racy fiction or some erotica. Get in the mood. Listen to music that turns you on or read racy fiction. Do some deep breathing and let your body totally relax. Practice dirty talk when you're alone. Fantasize about having sex with your partner and talking dirty to them. You can start by doing it in your head, but eventually do it out loud. Establish ground rules with your partner. One of the most common reasons people don't talk dirty is fear of sounding ridiculous, or being put down or rejected by a partner. It's important to set some rules when you're willing to take risks like this. Rules like no laughing at one another, and no judgment are important. In the heat of the moment anything can come out of your mouth, and you need to know that your partner is respectful of the ways that can be exposing. Don't rush. The first time you talk dirty to your partner, don't overdo it. Talk a little and see how your partner responds. A great way to start with dirty talk is to describe out loud what is happening during sex or by complimenting your partner. Describe what's happening and how it feels in your body. You can also start by telling your partner something you're going to do to them, or something you want them to do to you. It takes two to tango. Once you have initiated talking dirty with your partner, ask them to do the same. If your partner is uncomfortable, be gentle with them.
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